Not another diet post

I’m forever seeing Instagrams of clean eating. It’s always a bowl of spinach and nuts. Or fish. I hate spinach and nuts and fish. But it’s time to really crack on with this diet malarkey.

And yes, I know that a couple of months ago I wrote all the reasons I’d rather be chubby for but a lady’s prerogative is to change her mind, yes? Yes. 
Reasons I’m planning to lose a shed load of weight
1. I want to buy cheap jean in Primark or fancy jeans elsewhere and for them to fit nicely.
2. I’m going to Hawaii in June 2015, if there isn’t a photo of me looking hot in a grass skirt and coconut bikini then I won’t be happy. 
3. I don’t want my wedding photos to be a fiasco like my graduation ones (I had a fake tan disaster and my cheeks are so chubby that I’ve been likened- on more than one occasion to Michael McIntyre)
4. I want people to see me and notice the difference. I have one particular friend- who was never what I’d call chubby- but after dieting and spinning now looks amazing. She’s kept the weight off and just glows. So I wanna be her.
5. It’s healthy and I want to be that. It can’t be bad, can it?
So, after a weekend of extravagance (Easter), which continues until bedtime tonight, I will tomorrow commence the diet. The first day of the rest of my life.  I have a little over a year until the Big Day (and as such, the same before our honeymoon to Hawaii)- I don’t know the exact number of minutes and seconds like some people on the various social media sites that I look at all too often, which I think is ample time.
Why is this time going to be any different?
Good question- I’m glad you asked. As an aside, autocorrect amended “Good” to “food”, then. In the words of Cheryl Crow, isn’t it ironic?
Well this time I firmly believe it is different. Not least because I’ve discovered an excercise I actually enjoy (more about that later). I’ve already started dieting and seen some results and it feels good. Also I’m writing it down, publicly which means I have to stick to it or risk social embarrassment. 
What’s the plan?
Furiously Pinterest motivational quotes and healthy recipes and try not to cheat.
I’ve also text my Dad to see if he has a juicer I can borrow [have].
So, watch this space. I plan to update you in 12 weeks (15 July 2014). At that point it’ll have been 12 weeks and apparently you’ll be able to tell the difference….
By that point other things that will have happened are;
I’ll have had my anniversary with The Girl (always an opportunity to eat too much), simultaneously the wedding will be a year away and things get real.
I’ll have finished my part time studies and have every weekend free. This will be a real test- yes, it means I have more time to work out, it also means more time to practice excuses and be on day trips where eating healthy is near impossible.
It’ll be summer. I hope I’m ready to wear a pair of shorts or a skirt without tights.
I’ll (hopefully) have a set of visibly different before and after pictures for you.


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