What happened in my head when I watched GBBO. Episode 4.

What with the recent news, I watched this week’s GBBO with more than a tinge of sadness.

You know when I typed this and when I corrected it by now, yeah?

I hate the recap.

Oh yeah. Yorkshire pud week!

This is a hard week.

You’re better than this Mel,  Sue. 

Is batter baking?

Don’t flavour a Yorkshire!

Mary’s serious. She’s not pissing about this week.

You need it plain to accompany the chilli. I believe you, thousands wouldn’t. 

Aka I’m sticking to the recipe I know.

Mm Candice that sounds delish.

Fuck off andrew.

Mm also Janes. Keep it classic, that’s the key here.

Get your mixture cold and your pan hot. My mum taught me that.

Coconut and lime. Again.

A veggie Sunday lunch. The Worst.

Yes Andrew.

All getting the mixture cold. As I advised.

Eugh. Tofu?

What even is tofu?

What kind of fucking Christmas is it without a yorkshire pudding? 

I’d have to take my own tray from home.

Yeah temperature down then whack it up at the end.

That’s weird that’s what mary said.

Just whatever you do don’t open the oven.

Yes that’s right 

No they look too lightly done, Benjamina.

Oh my god this is terrible.

Oh, Tom.

Curse of the Star Baker.

Where are all the fillings?

That’s what she said.

Candice, your beef looks cooked to perfection.

Crap, Kate.

Jane. Yum

Obligatory candice innuendo ‘I’d be wetter of candice gave me that

I said they were underdone.

Eh, Mary.

Oh, Tom.

Mary: told you so

Didn’t he practice? 

Hours? Steady tom.

Lace pancake?!

One test?

Mary’s a lemon and sugar girl, ike me. 


Don’t lift your pencil.

What are they MEANT A TO LOOK LIKE?

Go Benjamina! 

What’s his name in 9th place?


Candice after last week.


I thought it was “chu- rows”

Is that cos am from Yorkshire?

Is a single churros a churro?

Fennel isnt sweet.

Didn’t he do Matcha a few weeks ago?

Also is Matcha savoury.

If do an infinity symbol.

Cos you wouldn’t want it to end.

He looked like he was having a poo just then.

Omg they’re gunna looks so good.

Jane looks SO worried

You might wanna get thay rash looked at Andrew, mate

No Tom that’s the wrong attitude.

Tom’s going.

Yep Kate. That’s what she was getting at. Bunny. Boiling Bunny Boiler. 

Jane you should’ve done that before

That’s how I eat my chicken too Val.  Half raw.

Why are his so phallic?

And by phallic I mean they look like little todgers

Tom’s going.

They’re perfect, Jane.

That just personal preference, Paul

Kate just repeats jokes.


I’ve had a bad bake.

Mrs wife: thought this was Bake off. Not baking bad.

Then she demands credit.

Yay that was obvious (called it).

Not your best shirt, Sue.



Next week pie.  Well pastry. All my fave foods. 


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